From: Freya (email suppressed)
Date: Sat Jan 13 2007 - 13:49:55 PST
Apologies to the nice people who have sent replies to
me on the list recently to whom I have not replied.
I'm sorry I've just not felt up to it. Sometime in the
future I'm sure I will pop back and have a normal
chat, but I can't even now.
I've been really, really shocked and upset by the news
about Helen Hill. I've sadly never met Helen but from
all your descriptions she sounds like exactly the kind
of filmmaker I would have loved to have met. She wrote
fanzines, tried to help people, made beautiful films
and even had a pet pig! I really got the impression
she was someone who cared and believed in doing good
things. She seemed like a very special person.
It would be a tradgedy at the best of times were it
not that Helen and her family seem like the kind of
people who do soooooo much to help others. I feel
somewhat heartbroken already so maybe it is just as
well that I have never met her as I would be
undoutedly be a thousand times more upset than I
already feel.
That this happened to a survivor of New Orleans is a
second horrible irony for me. I've been having a hard
time of things myself the last couple of years and
when the disaster happened in New Orleans I took much
heart from the fact that there were all these people
who had lost EVERYTHING but they were smiling and
looking forward to the future and talking about how
they were going to make a fresh start. It filled me
with hope for my own situation. Whenever there was
something about New Orleans out there I would read it
avidly and wish positive things for the people out
there. "Go for it, make a new life" I would think. I
felt proud of them and looked up to those people. I
wanted them to create wonderful and beautiful new
lives from scratch. I wanted them to do everything
I've failed to do for my own life. I really wanted to
believe in them.
It's been days now and I'm still crying and really
upset writing this now.
When Spike Lees new film came out I went to a lot of
trouble to try and see it. I wanted to know how things
were going there.
It was very apparent to me from what I saw, that the
government were still ignoring New Orleans. That they
had done little to help in what has been a staggering
disaster. It shouldn't suprise me. When it first
happened I came up with all kinds of plans in my mind
to get help to the people trapped in New Orleans, in
spite of the fact that it surely must have had all of
its road transport infrastructure destroyed. Of course
it turned out there was nothing wrong with the roads
to the superbowl, what was wrong was in the hearts and
minds of the people in the united states government.
They just didn't care, not at all.
I'm sure you are all thinking the same thing that I
am, that this tradgedy wouldn't have happened if there
had been a real effort on the part of the united
states government to genuinely address the disaster in
New Orleans. I really believe this to be true.
I hate the government of the united stats of america.
What a start to the new year this has been. :(
Really upset...
love to you all.
Take Care...
Freya
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